Not under any kind of impression, or knowing. Today, in a general drift.
Today on a makeshift raft dry in the sun adrift crystal water a few degrees too cold for swimming, just cold enough to chill the skin on the underside, and encourage me to stretch flat lizarding for the sun.
The water and the sun my reality by choice. Waiting outside the door of this raft: health, mortality, future, commitment, disease, transplant, uncertainty, fear, fatigue, isolation.
I shake my head a few times to get back on track. Board up that stupid door. Return to the raft and the spray and the infinity of the sun and clear cool water.